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Lessons in Blogging: Many People Read Things Emotionally Not Reasonably

emotional croppedNothing surprises me more than when I make a basic true statement and end up with a meltdown, accusation, or insult.

If the word modesty shows up in any conversation with a female under the age of, say 70, they have been trained, not unlike a few Rottweilers I met once in a junk yard at night, to begin slobbering with rage. I, it seems, love rapists, support rapists, think rapists should be given their own reality show.

If I suggest that I think that something that someone else does is sinful, wrong, or otherwise inappropriate, I am set upon by the tolerant masses with verbal sticks and stones that will not break my bones, but can hurt me. I am judgmental, hateful, merciless, and completely undeserving of either having an opinion or being allowed to voice it in any venue. “Thou shalt not Judge” it seems is Jesus’ way of abolishing any notion of right and wrong in the hope of heralding in a new era of tolerance and joy that leaves only the intolerant roasting over the flames of hell.

If I speak about personal responsibility, property rights, or sound economic principles, I can guarantee that the truth of my contempt for the poor will be exposed to the world within seconds. I obviously hate minorities and think we should enslave the populations of third world nations ’round the globe… and, perhaps, sell tickets to the rich so they can come kick poor people for personal entertainment.

If anything I say draws within a mile and a half of being critical of someone of the female persuasion, then I am a mean-spirited, bigoted pig, spewing contempt for women out of a patriarchal mental enslavement and a desire to oppress women the world over, because I obviously fear them, knowing secretly that they are my betters.

I once had a woman stand upon a chair pointing at me screaming, “Who will come to the aid of women! This man is attacking women!” because I corrected her on the school’s policies about gender neutral vs. gender inclusive speech in academic papers as she insulted, berated and demeaned an international student over a “pronoun oppressing” paper he had submitted to the class.

If I express a bit of proverbial wisdom, those around to hear or read it will immediately begin to find fault with the terms, pick at its breadth, and seek for an exception. (They usually need go no further than themselves… for surely they are the exception to every principle.) Having done this, they nullify the very notion of wisdom. They enlighten the world with the truth that there is no truth, no principles, no patterns, no “way of things.” All will be well if we just follow our hearts and stop trying to please other people by curbing our behavior and desires.

In fact, I’ve discovered that almost nothing that I say these days is heard or received with a desire to understand what I mean or why I’m saying it. Every remark is nothing but a platform for someone else to vent their own sensitivities, hurts, worries, and/or fears… to deflect any responsibility they might have to truth or right action and to deny any guilt or responsibility they might have for doing wrong.  Whatever I say, they feel bad and feeling bad is excuse enough to rage and rant and accuse.

So, here are the lessons I’ve learned in blogging.

  1. Blogs are short, but reach a wide audience whose personal experiences and needs are diverse. People respond from their own emotional relationship to the topic, often without reading what you have said reasonably.
  2. Try to anticipate meltdowns and address them as briefly as possible when writing. This will not prevent them, but it will allow you (after the fact) to point out to your attackers that you have already addressed their concerns. This is, of course, assuming that they have not already written you off and ejected from your life for daring to have an opinion.
  3. Get some tough skin. I take rejection badly, so this can be hard for me personally.
  4. Know your stuff… know yourself… know your positions well. But know that there is only so much you can say in 500-1000 words… so make your points simple and specific.
  5. Don’t rage back… be measured and calm… try to address reasonable points… apologize when mistaken… reiterate where misunderstood… but, know that you cannot please some people and you must learn to recognize these folks from the get-go. Blog Trolls are looking for offense and they are masters at cultivating it.

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